“Motherhood and Applepie.” We’ve been talking and walking it since the beginning of time. Crossing all cultural, generational and political divides, people have always happily contributed to the parenting equation as we were designed—and able—to do. Nurturing. Bonding. Instilling moral values into our offspring. Character training. Self-sacrifice in order to raise a whole next generation to greatness. These became time-honored traditions of the family, with the primary care-giver, most notably, the mother, putting more time into the dynamic. “Motherhood and Applepie” were in complete lockstep with societal and cultural expectations. 

And then time moved forward, expectations changed, and bright, highly-educated women were expected to fulfill their destiny in corporate boardrooms across America, “moving into leadership roles on an equal basis with their male classmates.” (The New York Times, September 20, 2005). The model got turned upside down on its head: “Motherpie and Applehood” became the new cultural “norm” and thus began “The Mommy Wars.”

And an interesting thing happened: time moved forward and women grew up. And we observed—firsthand—the sheer difficulty of joyfully living the now ubiquitous “life-work-balance” paradigm. We heard, in one ear, about the “oppressive culture of ‘total motherhood’ which has gone from “art” to “cult” with “suffocation” the direct result (author/journalist Judith Warner, Perfect Madness) to the assertion that “professional moms…have (sic) “misplaced vigor” (Sumru Erkut, Center for Research on Women, Wellesley College) to  the job being called a “mess” and motherhood a “trap powered by fear of a loss of face.” (The New York Times book critic Judith Shulevitz)

And with the other ear we heard that: Only 10% of working moms would choose to work full-time if money were no object; 51% of GenXer’s have traded super-careers for motherhood because when they viewed the trade-offs required to “gun” their own careers, they decided that the sacrifices required just weren’t worth it; of Harvard Business School’s women graduates of ’81, ’85, and ’91, only 38% are working full-time; and 26% of women at the cusp of the most senior levels of management do not want that next promotion, choosing more time at home with family over career advancement.

We’re conflicted. We‘re clearly absorbed in motherhood; recent statistics find 8,500 people “Mommy Blogging” or hosting “online shrine(s) to parental self-absorption” and “parenting narcissism.” (David Hochman, The New York Times.) But we’re also confused by messages proclaimed by the media; by pop culture; and by the quagmire which we sometimes find ourselves in during sweeping midlife changes. We gasp at the significant sacrifices we’ve made to home life if we’ve chosen career, or become completely shattered by the dramatic realization of difficult workforce re-entry if we’ve chosen home life. And yet as an international sisterhood, we look around and admit that we face a universal search for wisdom and that our everyday challenges are strikingly similar. We agree that “the wars” only serve to divide—not unify—and to degrade—and not edify. We acknowledge that we’re all in the same proverbial boat, riding similar waves, even though our navigation systems may have constructed different charts.    

The time has come to give mothers a universal voice, and to give the role of motherhood the gravitas it needs. The Rocket Mom Society will officially launch at 7 PM on November 17 in Ridgefield, CT in the home of founder Carolina Fernandez to “encourage, equip and empower moms for excellence.” Members will acknowledge that even in its oftentimes painful, overwhelming everyday reality, motherhood is still the most important—and creative, joyful—job ever invented. And we’ll seek to learn strategies to propel our families to greatness. As outlined in Fernandez’ best-selling parenting book, ROCKET MOM! 7 Strategies To Blast You Into Brilliance, these hands-on strategies will serve to equip members to create families with long-lasting, far-reaching legacies. For we acknowledge that as cradle-rockers and vision-casters, we possess the unique privilege of shaping the world. Fernandez, wife and mother of four, author, speaker, entrepreneur and founder, will serve as the unapologetically optimistic leader of this potentially international sisterhood society.